Those who abuse use blaming to confuse and control you. They use blaming to keep you in line and conform to what they want to do. They use it to punish you because their reality they believe in is not a "kind person's" reality.
If you ever experienced the abuse in any way, realize that what you felt about yourself was a projection from another person's reality, and you bought into it at that time.
You can stop it at any time if you're willing to.
- Neville Goddard